Monday, July 30, 2012

My Sweet Chase

Chase and I really went the rounds last week.  He was in one of those awful phases where he'd melt down for me on the drive home each afternoon and the madness didn't stop until bedtime.  It's those moments where I'm the one acting more like a three year old than him, in response to his behavior, that I feel like a total failure of a mother and I have to spend some quality time praying for patience and wisdom and oh yeah, forgiveness.  Because like the poignant quote I saw today, they way we speak to our children becomes their inner voice.  And that's both beautiful and haunting.  But today, we were perfect.  He was so well behaved at the doctor's office, helped me make dinner, played kindly with his little brother, and then came the best part...during the bedtime snuggle.  As we were laying there he softly whispered, "I love you so much mommy", and my heart just smiled.  When it was time for me to leave he asked if he could sing me a song first.  Maybe it was just a clever stall tactic, but as that tender little voice sang "You Are My Sunshine" to me I couldn't have possibly been any happier in that moment.  And those are the moments I hope he'll remember, because they are certainly the ones I'll never forget.